Can Your Body Reject Someone Even When You Don't?

Recently on Instagram psychologist Danish Bashir who goes by @narcabusecoach, who is also part of the American Academy of Experts in Traumatic Stress shared a post: "6 Ways Your Body Is Telling You It Hates the Presence of Narcissist".

Signs Your Body Is Rejecting Someone

The post talks about how your body is capable of rejecting a person, whether a friend or a partner if it does not feel safe around them. There are signs that your body gives you. Some of the most common signs are muscle knots. These are myofascial trigger points that can be a manifestation of trauma. Dr Bashir suggested that your body responds to the negativity by tensing up muscles, sometimes leading to painful knots.

The second thing he noted was tinnitus. Dr Bashir says that ringing in the ears can be a distressing symptom for survivors of trauma and narcissistic abuse. Shortness of breath is another symptom that comes from the chronic stress and anxiety. Any persistent physical pain that does not go away can also be a sign. Sleep disruption and gut issues could also be result of prolonged stress.

While these seem like interesting points, we wanted to check if it is actually the case? We may have felt that our body is trying to give us signs to distance ourselves from a particular person. However, the question is, how does our body know? How does it do this? The most important one: When should we start listening to our body? To know more we spoke to senior psychologist Rajnandini Dey about it.

What Does The Expert Say?

Dey says that body can indeed "reject" a toxic person before we consciously recognize the toxicity. "Individuals with past traumatic experiences or insecure attachment styles may be more attuned to subtle, often unconscious signs of danger. These signs, such as anxiety attacks, muscle tension, or a feeling of coldness, are the body's physiological response to perceived threats—whether emotional, psychological, or relational."

Dey also explains that when people are in a toxic or unhealthy relationships they may ignore these signs due to many factors rooted in past trauma and attachment patterns. Dey also gives an instance where individuals with insecure attachments or childhood trauma may have learned to suppress or dismiss their emotional and physical cues in order to maintain connection or avoid conflict. They may also have a distorted sense of what "normal" behavior looks like in relationships. This makes them more likely to tolerate discomfort or distress.

Feeling Butterflies? Check If It Is A Trauma Response

But, why does this happen? "This happens because trauma and attachment issues often shape one's ability to trust their instincts," Dey says. A person who has experienced neglect, abuse, or inconsistent caregiving may have a diminished ability to recognize or respond to their body's warning signals. In such cases, anxiety and stress responses may become normalized, leading individuals to overlook their body's attempts to protect them. "Because they are so normalized, these signs may even be mistaken as “excitement” or “nervousness” due to the new relationship energy." This is why feeling butterflies in your stomach may not always be the best thing.

The brain may also be in survival mode, prioritizing the avoidance of confrontation or the need to stay connected, even at the cost of well-being. Over time, these internalized patterns can lead to chronic stress, physical tension, and emotional numbness.

What can be done? "Trauma-informed care recognizes that these physical and emotional responses are not simply "overreacting" or irrational; they are deeply rooted in past experiences and survival strategies. Healing requires recognizing and reestablishing trust in one's body and emotions, while also addressing attachment wounds and unhealthy relational patterns."

Rajnandini Dey is a senior Psychologist at Veda Rehabilitation & Wellness