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Riya Baibhawi

Once Suicidal, Counselor Shares 8 Solid Reasons To Live—Number 3 Is My Favorite

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Once Suicidal, Counselor Sam Dylan Finch Gives 8 Solid Reasons To Live—Number 3 Is My Favorite

Suicide kills over 7,20,000 people every year, and I would admit that I have been there, too. I was fascinated with the idea of a new life, wherein I no longer had to be myself, where things would have been different. The life that I am currently living feels like a struggle, and I feel extremely lonely. My career was plunging, and so were my relationships with others. It was then that I underwent therapy, and life has not been the same since then.

Here are a few things you should know, as per counsellor Sam Dylan Finch, who was once suicidal

You Are Not As Lonely As You Feel

Many individuals in crisis believe that no one cares about them, leading to feelings of shame or fear that prevent them from opening up. This often results in further withdrawal and isolation. While it may seem like everyone is preoccupied with their own lives, the reality is that people are often unaware of what is going on in someone else’s mind. If they knew, they would likely be willing to listen or help in any way possible.

Distress Can Cloud Solutions

During a crisis, distress can be overwhelming, making it seem like the only reality. The natural urge to escape pain can lead to thoughts of suicide as a seemingly immediate relief.  However, this is often a case of tunnel vision—a perspective that distorts reality by presenting only one possible outcome. This perception is misleading.

Whether facing loneliness, abuse, job insecurity, or any other challenge, no situation is insurmountable. Solutions may exist, even if they are not immediately visible, which is why it is essential to allow yourself time.

Nothing Is Final Until It Is Over

In a crisis, feeling trapped is common. You may believe that you have lost all chances at the life you desired or that a meaningful relationship is permanently severed. However, suicidal thoughts often arise from desperation and helplessness—emotions that are not permanent. In this case, focusing on facts can give you clarity. 

No matter how overwhelming loneliness, hopelessness, or anger may feel now, these emotions will change over time. They are not permanent states. Circumstances evolve. Mistakes or missteps do not mean the end of opportunities. Continuing to move forward provides a chance to regain control and make positive changes.

Chronic health conditions, emotional struggles, or a lack of fulfillment can make life seem pointless. When joy and significance appear absent, giving up might feel like the only option. Yet, life does hold meaning. The challenge is to recognize or create it. It may not always be grand or transformative, but it is there. Identifying personal strengths, past goals, and meaningful connections can help you rediscover purpose.

Mistakes Do Not Define You

Struggles can lead to actions or words that cause pain, intensifying feelings of guilt and self-doubt. It is common to believe that those who are hurt are better off without you, which can further reinforce negative thoughts. However, the fact that someone feels hurt often indicates that they care. This can serve as motivation to apologize, seek reconciliation, or repair relationships. Everyone makes mistakes. Acknowledging them and taking steps to improve allows for personal growth and the opportunity to rebuild relationships—including the one with yourself.

Suicide is often described as a permanent solution to temporary struggles. While some problems may not be temporary, time allows for healing and change. Trauma and loss do not disappear, but they can be processed in a way that allows for a fulfilling future. The key is giving life the opportunity to unfold in unexpected and positive ways.

Future Remains Unwritten.

Living with uncertainty takes courage. The unknown can be intimidating, and fear of future hardships can prevent forward movement. However, the future is unpredictable. While difficulties may arise, so too can unexpected joys and opportunities. Preparing for potential challenges is wise, but it is equally important to remain open to positive possibilities.

So, no matter how bad the situation gets, there is always hope. If you or someone around you is feeling suicidal, you can call 911 (US), 111 (NHS UK). There are various other suicide prevention helpline numbers available in India and other countries. Remember, ending your life is never the solution.

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Suicide kills over 7,20,000 people every year, and I would admit that I have been there, too. I was fascinated with the idea of a new life, wherein I no longer had to be myself, where things would have been different. The life that I am currently living feels like a struggle, and I feel extremely lonely. My career was plunging, and so were my relationships with others. It was then that I underwent therapy, and life has not been the same since then. Here are a few things you should know, as per counsellor Sam Dylan Finch, who was once suicidalYou Are Not As Lonely As You FeelMany individuals in crisis believe that no one cares about them, leading to feelings of shame or fear that prevent them from opening up. This often results in further withdrawal and isolation. While it may seem like everyone is preoccupied with their own lives, the reality is that people are often unaware of what is going on in someone else’s mind. If they knew, they would likely be willing to listen or help in any way possible.Distress Can Cloud SolutionsDuring a crisis, distress can be overwhelming, making it seem like the only reality. The natural urge to escape pain can lead to thoughts of suicide as a seemingly immediate relief.  However, this is often a case of tunnel vision—a perspective that distorts reality by presenting only one possible outcome. This perception is misleading.Whether facing loneliness, abuse, job insecurity, or any other challenge, no situation is insurmountable. Solutions may exist, even if they are not immediately visible, which is why it is essential to allow yourself time.Nothing Is Final Until It Is OverIn a crisis, feeling trapped is common. You may believe that you have lost all chances at the life you desired or that a meaningful relationship is permanently severed. However, suicidal thoughts often arise from desperation and helplessness—emotions that are not permanent. In this case, focusing on facts can give you clarity. Emotions Are TemporaryNo matter how overwhelming loneliness, hopelessness, or anger may feel now, these emotions will change over time. They are not permanent states. Circumstances evolve. Mistakes or missteps do not mean the end of opportunities. Continuing to move forward provides a chance to regain control and make positive changes.Finding Meaning In LifeChronic health conditions, emotional struggles, or a lack of fulfillment can make life seem pointless. When joy and significance appear absent, giving up might feel like the only option. Yet, life does hold meaning. The challenge is to recognize or create it. It may not always be grand or transformative, but it is there. Identifying personal strengths, past goals, and meaningful connections can help you rediscover purpose.Mistakes Do Not Define YouStruggles can lead to actions or words that cause pain, intensifying feelings of guilt and self-doubt. It is common to believe that those who are hurt are better off without you, which can further reinforce negative thoughts. However, the fact that someone feels hurt often indicates that they care. This can serve as motivation to apologize, seek reconciliation, or repair relationships. Everyone makes mistakes. Acknowledging them and taking steps to improve allows for personal growth and the opportunity to rebuild relationships—including the one with yourself.Time Can Help Ease PainSuicide is often described as a permanent solution to temporary struggles. While some problems may not be temporary, time allows for healing and change. Trauma and loss do not disappear, but they can be processed in a way that allows for a fulfilling future. The key is giving life the opportunity to unfold in unexpected and positive ways.Future Remains Unwritten. Living with uncertainty takes courage. The unknown can be intimidating, and fear of future hardships can prevent forward movement. However, the future is unpredictable. While difficulties may arise, so too can unexpected joys and opportunities. Preparing for potential challenges is wise, but it is equally important to remain open to positive possibilities.So, no matter how bad the situation gets, there is always hope. If you or someone around you is feeling suicidal, you can call 911 (US), 111 (NHS UK). There are various other suicide prevention helpline numbers available in India and other countries. Remember, ending your life is never the solution.

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Once Suicidal, Counselor Shares 8 Solid Reasons To Live—Number 3 Is My Favorite

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